Unpredictable

Today I realized that I don't know how to have fun. I mean, I know how to have fun, but not real, genuine fun. I can when I'm around others who know how to but I've never really learned how to have an accessive amount of good time. I don't think its no so much learning as it is just being around it. So actually, I've never been around real fun throughout the entire span of my life. It seems weird to think about this, but that's what I want my life to be. Sometimes I take shit too seriously. It would be nice to be goofier, but not to the point of immaturity. Once I step back at look at the situation I see that whenever I'm around people who are naturally reserved I tend to get bored and metamorphesize into that quiet way of life. But when I'm around the constant unpredictableness and humor of a funny person, I change into that. Mentally and emotionally it feels so much better and clearer to laugh and play around a little. Hopefully in the continuing years of my life I will meet more people who improve me instead of deteriorate me (and my spirit).