Before it is too late...Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, etc. Be safe, happy and healthy for 2006. :)

I miss being a kid at Christmas. I miss "Santa's" annual visits and how my mom always filled the bottom of my stocking with oranges and apples. I miss the giddy feeling that only children have and the nostalgia of it all. Christmas was always filled with cheer, innocence and beauty (and sleeping in). Now it is just like "Eeh." Traditions are being broken and the spirit is not in the air. We didn't even get a god damn tree this year! Now that is screwed up.

I discovered working retail really isn't my "thing". Nine hours on my feet while being just about as bored as a blind person watching a silent film? No thank you. Bussing pizza is better than this.

Also, OSU Business advisors can suck iiiiiit. And they better be ready because it is huge and puts up a mean battle.

Thank you.

Plugs: Dmitri, Stephanie

1. I kissed a hot guy.
2. I miss my college friends.
3. I'm listening to Underneath (wtf is wrong w/me?)
4. I'm in a very good mood...and have been for many months on end. This is the longest stretch where happiness has outweighed the sadness.
5. I desperately need to brush my teeth.
6. I like sandwiches a lot.
7. I say "I" too much but don't know how to get around not saying it.
8. I feel have an awkward feeling that I will fall in love soon, in a very unexpected way, place, and time.
9. The holiday season stresses me out--gift giving is a pain but opening presents is one of the many joys in life.
10. I really need to go to a good concert.
11. I feel like painting and making a photo album of black and whites.
12. I really wish I could fly.
13. One of my biggest fears is letting people down or have them think badly about me...and E.T. (the alien, not the show).
14. I love being artsy.
15. I want to make a snowman and a snowangel.
16. And finally, if you've been able to sort through this mess of randomness, the photo gallery is really coming soon. I promise.

When I said I wanted to work this winter break, I meant a few hours here and there. Not freaking 8-9 hours per day almost all week! My gosh, when will I have time to do nothing? haha At least my pay check will be nice and healthy. Plus I sell jewlery so that is kind of fun :) Ahh the life a chain retail empolyee...

Um yeah and my legs are sore. That is quite sad.

Plugs: Will, Alex, Stephanie

This post is dedicated to all who have exams (particularly Stephanie). I am here to assist you in your many hours of procrastination, avoidance and dread.

I bought a new pair of jeans about an hour ago. Pure loooove and joy. Good thing I don't have a credit card because it would be maxed out on denim. Some of my weaknesses: cute socks and underwear, jeans, sexy high heels, the colors turquoise and raspberry-ish.

I made a free Christmas card yesterday (at the UO bookstore--someone slap me, I am such a trader). It felt so nice to be creative. It reminded me how much I miss it and how much I need it. Maybe instead of my ballroom class I will take an art course of some sort.

Mmm peanut butter is so good. If only we had some oreos.

By the time school resumes in January, I am going to have abs of fucking steel. They used to be sexy. Then laziness set in.

Edit // Dear God I'm starting to like (some) country music. Please smack me in the face really, really hard. Then repeat 5 times or as many as necessary. (Damnit, Sarah..look what you have done to me!)

So I might as well shoot myself now...or cry really hard for days on end. Fuck. Fuck, this just fucking sucks. Why do I always screw myself over when someone good comes along? The only great guy that comes onto me, I fucking reject him and by the time I realize how amazing he is and how much I like him, he gets with one of my friends. I..ugh AHHHJH'. God damnit this hurts really, really bad.

My roommie is playing our "angry" music for me. haha She is great.

My lovlies: Alex & Stephanie

Edit / I just discovered that "Just Friends" by Gavin DeGraw is not a good song to listen to.

Southern Comfort isn't so comforting when you are hugging the toliet (but it tastes damn good going down). I've never been that shitfaced before and I don't want to again. Afer my puking escapade we came back here and kicked it with some friends til 6am. I was feeling fine, thinking "Heck yes, I'm not even going to have a hangover." When I woke up this morning I barfed again...and again. Everyone did say that despite all the shit that was going down, I still had a smile on my drunken face. And that my friends, is true Ashley style haha. My friends are amazing though and they showed how much they really care. How do you pay somebody back for that? Being just as supportive and caring in return? But it doesn't seem like enough.

Anyway, I think my drinking days are over for a while.

AHH I NEED TO CONFESS MY LOVE TO HIM BECAUSE IT IS KILLING ME INSIDE.

I had my chance but blew it. Hopefully I will get another.

// end outburst

I smell like fried/burnt food. Eww :\ I was going to upload my photo gallery (as suggested by Dmitri) but my FTP doesn't work here. Freaking A. Also, I've become a compulsive napper.

I have a feeling something wonderful is going to come about soon...then something horrible. There is nothing dead about dead week. I really need to find a job for winter break or else I will be bored shitless. This afternoon all the of washers and dryers were empty. It was the first time I didn't have to fight for a dryer. There is a certain male I can't get out of my head. I am forcing myself to blog, it is obvious?

A list of smiple yet amazing things:
-naps on rainy afternoons
-warm, fuzzy scarves (not a la Taylor Hanson..aww, Hanson..I forgot about you boys)
-laundry fresh out of the dryer
-hugs
-people who truly care for you
-black and white photography
-exotic flowers
-realizing what you want
-realizing what is important
-confidence
-a nice juicy piece of fruit (not to be taken sexually)

^^Feel free to add...

I've never had this hot of a guy go after me before. And he is actually making the effort to call, make plans, etc. Tall, strong, and sexy. Wouldn't it be amazing if it worked out? I would probably crap myself out of pure joy.

Also, I suuuck at cards. Like even worse than I do at pool...and that is pretty damn bad.

I attended my first screamo concert the other night. Music was good, singing was good, screaming was bad.

I feel like fucking dancing.

Plugs: RJA, Dmitri, Alex

Wow. I broaded my religious horizons tonight. It gave me some...interesting insight. Definitely not many that I agreed with, but interesting none the less. I already have light in my life without religious direction, thank you. And I am not sinning nor am I lost in a life of darkness and bad behavior becauase I do not follow the word of God. The band was good though.

I wish there was a person who could give me daily big, warm and fuzzy bear hugs.

Plugs: Dmitri, Alex, Stephanie

I have the sudden urge to march in a protest. People here don't protest. Where are you my liberal leaning counterparts? I feel so politically and creatively deprived here...must join some clubs to fill that void.

Plain and simple, I have become addicted to Nature Valley granola bars, online shopping, and visions of romance.

Speaking of romance, I had a vision of my love life today. I will date a few semi-preppy yet down to earth guys but end up marrying a ruggedly handsome outdoorsy-type. We'd live in the mountains, maybe own a few pigs (I've always wanted a pig) and a freaking awesome big, cuddly dog. We'd have a grand fire place and sit around drinking beer, naked and wrapped up in blankets enjoying eachother's company in the beautiful firelight. Talking sweet nothings with the smell of chocolate chip cookies baking in the background and snow gracefully dancing around our cozy home.

Plugs: Dmitri, Alex, Laura, Stephanie, and RJA (because he knows why)

Sooo, last night. Aaahaha. They always say it is a bad idea to start something with people in your dorm. If I would have reciprocated his affection, we would have had sex. Like woah, I'm not ready to be deflowered yet. Guys are so weird. Hmm so yeah, I will keep you guys posted on this situation.

Edit @ 11:26 pm // This is very odd. I don't know how to deal with this because I am so innocent when it comes to anything sexual. I feel pathetic saying it, almost prude. But I am not going to give myself away to some random guy. No good ever comes out of that. I am not going to let somebody use me. I deserve to be treated well and so does everyone else.

What an invigorating mid-morning; a nice workout with 15 minutes on the bike, 15 minutes on the eliptical, and a short run home in the rain. With my head down and hood on, halfway back I had a revelation and realized what a beautiful thing running in the rain is. I shed my hood and turn my face upward, soaking up all of it's glory. Oh, and my "Kickin' Workout Beats" playlist? ...It fucking rocks.

Plugs: Stephanie, Dmitri, Alex, Laura

ahaha I love OSU on the weekends. Last night I got wasted and had a really, really good time. Probably the best since I've been here. I hit on like..every hot guy in sight, laughed continuously for hours, danced my ass off, got invited to come back to bed with a boy (who was surprisingly sober yet very horny), and ate a cookie..or two. There is more substance behind these stories but maybe that will be for a later time. I have massive homework and plus I can't find my shoes. And also, my best friend is really the best.

Major commenters props: Laura, Nile, Dmitri, Alex

Got my freak on last night. Woot w00t. What dancing fools we were. I attract the weirdest guys haha. My butt is a little sore.

My best friend might be transferring to another school next term. This makes me really sad. I don't know what I'm going to do without her. :(

A photo gallery is coming soon! So be prepared.

Edit // I might like a new boy.

Here, I discovered that am either really happy or really sad. Lonely/jealous or loved/content. There is generally no middle ground. And the jealousy issue is a killer sometimes.

Plugs: Alex, RJA, Dmitri, Stephanie

My roommate used my speakers over the weekend while I was gone. They are switched in different places. You do NOT use my speakers without asking. The end.

I made a mistake on Friday that I think made him hate me (even more haha). I don't want to babble forever, so I will leave it at that. The fall out I predicted a few weeks ago has happened. We've basically stopped talking. It might be for the better because I think I liked the idea of him more than him. But fuck, I'm tired of being lonely.

Written at home while I was internet-less:

October 14, 2005 @ 7:14 PM

It's weird being home. Everything is so quiet. I haven't witnessed this much quiet in an extended period of time for weeks. I miss my dorm more now than I have missed home. Shouldn't it be the other way? It has also made me realize how disconnected I am with the world outside off OSU. I haven't read the paper in ages.

It's nice to stink up my own bathroom for once.

Plugs: Alex, RJA, Dmitri

Monster Cookies are divine. The ones they have here are so easily accessible and delicious. They are to blame when I get fat. It's not if, it's when. There are many bad temptations here. And bad music (my god people, get some taste!).

I do miss that comfort of deeply liking somebody. I've been trying to suppress any feelings that I have for him. Is that stupid? I still don't know what to do/think.

I have a longing urge to go shopping.

Plugs // RJA, Laura, Dmitri

Okay so I'm pretty much sad, depressed and confused right now. I feel a good cry coming on. I don't know how to handle all these emotions and thoughts.

More on this later, for I am hella tired and my bed is calling...

(cont. on Oct 7 @ 12:37 pm)

He came up and visited yesterday. It was going good until a certain point at conversation during diner. It made me realize how immature he is (despite his age) and what is motives are. I've done a lot of thinking and talking with people who I trust look up to. I can do better. I will always consider him a friend but I don't envision anything happening between us unless there is something much more deeper under his skin.

The Lovelies: RJA, Rain, Mez, Dmitri, Stephanie, Alex

College is fuunnn. Boys are fun. College boys are fun.

Shit. Sometimes you wonder if things are meant to be and why things go certain ways. Maybe all of them are signs. He tried to come up today but with my school schedule it wouldn't work. We agreed on the "next week" thing...but it is now or never. It's like when someone says, "I'll call you later, we'll hang out!" and you know it's not going to happen. They just say it because there is nothing else to say. I am determined not to let that happen.

I see many of potentials per day, so why do I keeping hanging on to him?

Room still smells like shit despite my air freshening attempts, although it is a little homier as we add to our decoration repertoire.

Plugs: Dmitri Von Klien, RJA, Alex, Janet

Underage drinking in the dorm is dumb. Blatantly drinking during the football game is dumb. Going out to a house party, fine. But why would you risk getting kicked out and fined just to get a buzz before you go out? People are stupid and I'm not going to participate in that. Sometimes my responsibility and fear of consequences takes the better of me and hinders me from having fun. I plan to go out but not be an idiot.

I need him to visit to see if my feelings have changed and/or if they are true (haha I'm so needy). Either way, he has changed my life. (My Dove chocolate fortune said to 'Send a love letter this week' *raises eyebrows*).

In the past couple of days I've done more walking and tripping then I ever have. I seriously trip at least 2-3 times a day. haha It's great comedic relief.

Mad crazy party last night. /Kidding/. When we got there, the keg was dry. We walked around for an hour trying to find something else. I have blisters on all four sides of my feet to prove. The end.

I have a sinking feeling that me and him are going to have a fall out if we don't see one another soon.

My roommie got us a rug but it smells like shit and I don't know how to tell her.

Plugs / RJA, Stephanie, Dmitri

Is there a good way to hide the ugliness of 5 million cords? My desk is engulfed in hordes of them. My freaking cool mouse pad doesn't work with my mouse, the drag is horrible. How disappointing. I desperately need more decorations. This place is so sterile looking.

He called me. <33 He never fades from my mind. I'll see something/someone that reminds me of him and my mind goes off into a distant land. It's kind of comforting in a way.

Ahhh college life. I've met a lot of nice, new people. We're attempting to get our room all settled and cozy. My roommate seems pretty cool so far. Our hall is a bit quite. Everyone looks so young.

I chickened out last night. I couldn't get myself to tell him how I really feel. We had a good night though. His hugs are great. Today he texted me a couple of times, once asking if boys were allowed in my dorm and again saying that he would have to come up and visit. Wheee. I love being in his company and I miss it horribly. I miss the way he makes me laugh. I miss the way he makes me smile. I miss the way he makes me feel.

Tuesday is the big day. Dorm life will be a different experience, I hope I adjust alright. I'm going to fucking miss his ass. I don't think I'll ever meet a person like him again.

Tomorrow I'm either making a move or telling him the way I feel. I honestly have no idea how we are going to end up. It would be so much easier if he confessed his love (if he has any) but life/love isn't that way. /Aw, he just texted me./

I'm trying to keep it cool but secretly I'm stressing. This whole packing business can be overwhelming. I know I'm going to forget something important.

Dmitri: No doubt I will. :)

This could go two ways--an incredible relationship or a beautiful friendship. Obviously the former is preferred but either way would be satisfying. He is an amazing person that I never want to lose contact with. We'll see what happens in these days to come...

He. Is. So. Cute. Wheee.

The end.

Plugs: Dmitri, RJA

I can't stop thinking about him. It's gotten to the point where it's horribly annoying. Before it was comforting but now it needs to stop. Is it supposed to be like this? Is this normal? I think I really will insane if this continues. Hell, I don't even know if he likes me back. If he doesn't it will surely break my heart.

I've never had my heart broken. I don't know if I could emotionally handle rejection at that level. Yes, I've had my feelings hurt with the dreaded situation of "my crush ended up asking my friend out". But daaang. This is a lot of poo.

I need a hug.

Plugs: RJA, Mez, Dmitri

So I wrote a really sweet entry late last night and then my browser quit (okay, actually it was quite lame but that is unimportant). Shit, I really wish I wasn't leaving now...and it's all because of a boy. A new one, a better one, a beautiful one that makes me smile and laugh and feel all giddy like a little girl. Last night was much fun. I can't recall the last time I felt that happy. Why did he have to come into my life at such an inconvenient time? I could go on forever about him but alas, I don't want to bore you.

Woah, my hair is short. I'm still getting used to seeing myself with shoulder length hair and side bangs.

Things are winding down, work is coming to an end, high school is finally left behind. It is all so sad yet refreshing at the same time. There are things, people, and memories that I will hold closely to my heart and never forget. To me, that is beautiful.

<3: Laura, Stephanie, RJA, Dmitri

No more am I going to let you hold me down. For I am in control of me. I am free on my own behalf. Your fears will not become mine. Your protection has hindered my growth. Now I am reborn, creating my life the way I want it.

In the words of Eric Cartman...

Utter madness. Sheer chaos. Is this world.

A person doesn't realize how attached they are to their surroundings until hits them with the fact that they are leaving. As much as I don't like Eugene, I love it. I love it's little quirky attributes, the odd beauty you can find walking down the streets, the hippies (the hippies!!), but most of all I'm used to it. This is what I know. I don't know much else. From this point on, I'm going to be creating a new "Eugene" for myself. This intrigues me but scares me at the same time.

I hope that next year I can post here with many a great stories...and bad ones too. I want to fuck up, make mistakes, and grow. I want to have fun and enjoy my youth in all it's youthful glory..or something to that sort. I don't want to become another drab individual always looking for something better. Most of all, I want to find myself and feel completed for the first time in my life. I know this will not happen in a mere 4 years but over a lifetime.

I feel much more clear-headed after writing that (did I just have a mini-revelation?). Oh the joys of blogging.

Plugs: Laura

EDIT // I got some kickin' speakers for my dorm room today. Plus a printer AND the perfect academic planner. YES.

Somedays I think I like him and others I don't. Isn't it weird how interaction between two people, depending on the intensity, can make or break an attraction? There is also another boy man. *giggle* Oh he is super. Super sweet, super funny, super cute with a super smile. Supa, supa, dat's supa (haha how fun it is to quote old hanson videos). He is one of those guys you can tell is a genuinely good guy that would be worth pursuing. If only I wasn't leaving in a couple of weeks, then me and him would be togetha. Oh fho sho!

I finally jumped into the new and improved technology pool and got a camera flip phone. It is tres fun.

Random, funny quote of the day: "Last week North Korea publicly admitted for the first time it has nuclear weapons. The Bush administration has so far shown very little concern, as the North Korean missiles are believed only capable of reaching the Blue States." --Jon Stewart

Props to the Canadian, Blink fanatic, and X-Filer...love you guys. :)

New stiggin' friggin' layout (featuring Mischa Barton)! Let me know your thoughts, for they are always appreciated. In the past six months my graphic design activity has dropped significantly, so this layout sprouted from a creative burst of design energy.

I'm making it a habit to do my lame pilates/yoga video every day since I terminated my gym membership due to work schedule conflicts (sometimes they make me open the restaurant at 10 am, ew). I don't know if it is working but it's quite relaxing on the muscles.

I might go make brownies.

I also might like a boy. I haven't decided yet/haven't accepted the fact that there might be a possible crush. Just something childish out of a lack of boredom.

Plug: x

I think I've learned this summer to cherish what I have, because nothing ever stays the same.

Today I was contemplating space time. I thought, "There are no time zones in space, so how can they tell what time it is?" Then it occurred to me that time in space doesn't even matter. Maybe time in years, centuries, and millenniums, but certainly not in minutes.

The only thing keeping me from closing this site is the past. I have a hard time getting rid of things I've kept so close to my heart for so long.

Occasionally at work I have the strongest urges to butt in on people's conversations. Eves dropping is quite entertaining and I can't suppress the need to put my five cents in.

I'm finding all these people from my old elementary school in Washington on thefacebook and is it weeeeird, man. Really weird. It's odd to think of those people as grown up because in my mind they are all little 5th graders.

This blog is going downhill. Hopefully it will make a turn for the better and win the tour de blog when college starts in the fall. I have no idea what I'm talking about at this point so I dearly excuse any random, unexplainable words that come out of my mouth. No hands, actually. My hands get dry from work, so sometimes I use lotion. The non-greasy kind (of course).

Question of the day: What would your catch phrase be if you were a playa (assuming you aren't one)?

The past, present and future changes of this year feel like they almost belong to someone else. Graduation, working, legalization, college seem so "adult", yet I feel so immature and inexperienced. I've accepted these changes but my problem is that I haven't embraced them.

OSU Registration, with the intent to make us feel like all-grown up collegiates, only made me feel younger. High school still lingered in the auras of the attendees. Fresh minds and eager spirits. It reminded me of the term "eager beaver" which is kind of ironic considering we are the Oregon State Beavers (haha hot damn, I'm full of puns). By the way, I'm taking badminton Fall term lmfao. It can't get any cooler than that.

My feet smell horrible! It must be the thin socks creating some sort of smelly sweat complex.

I painted today and it reminded me how much I love arting (why isn't that a word?).

Wonderful, lovely, amazing commenters: Mez, RJA, Sez

Shit. Almost two months. The dry spell will be cleared up very soon. Until then, think of how I can celebrate my 18th birthday on the 27th of this very special month of July.

It seems like a blogging dry spell has fallen upon me these past few days. I am very sorry to my three loyal visitors. So from the depths of my cozy bed, I introduce to you the latest entry:

Most of the people at work are very friendly and nice. There is one girl who is super cool and slightly reminds me of Daria. She has been nice from day one but not in a fake, over-exaggerated way. My hands are dry and have started to peel in some areas from touching water all day. The life of a busser is truly glamorous. I also need to start learning everyones names, especially my managers. I'm so bad with names (doesn't everyone say that?).

Since reading about the "all who is inside of a car looks like they are riding in a funeral procession" part in Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, I've realized how true that is for others and myself. I feel confined in a car, trapped behind glass. Maybe that is why I'm not too fond of driving. I need something more free and open. Instead of buying a car a few years down the road, I might just get an electric bike. If I wasn't so chicken I'd consider a motorcycle. But I'm not that hardcore yet.

Lately I've been going through this miniscule "save the earth" phase. I've been recycling eeevverything at home, and while at work, feeling guilty about throwing a recyclable in the trash. As well as thinking if I had to get a car it would be a hybrid or an even eltectric (if they didn't make them so ugly. Why can't they make "healthy" car good looking?) There is also some good news--if you visited the "saveourvalley" link I posted a few entries back, you'll be glad to know that there will NOT be a power plant going in. The proposal was scrapped after the company classified it as an "unsuitable area with much opposition".

I beat my high score on Pac Man today.

PLUGS: Alex & RJA

I registered to vote yesterday. It was a proud moment in my life. :)

I'm having second thoughts about this dorm thing. Considering I hate public restroom/communal bathrooms, it will be an interesting challenge. See, I need privacy on the throne. I need to sit my little butt down, get relaxed and comfortable to make the best of my bathroom experience. And how could I do that knowing that 5 million other asses have been on that toilet. I'm fine with my own poop germs, but other peoples'?...forget it!

After months of a dry spell in the unemployed but looking life, I have hit some gold. Over the past few days I've had two interviews and two others that I had to shoot down because I landed a job. Wooh! I'll be busing at a local pizza joint. haha And wearing a sweet uniform too.

Plugs: Michelle, Alex, Johnny Crash (aksjdfhaksdhf I love the Bleu Jeans idea. Simply perfect.)

Watch out world, I am armed and so very, very dangerous. I now have an Oregon Foodhandler Card. Beware, because I can legally cook your food. And please, stay out of the danger zone (aka 41-140 degrees).

I think I found my destiny on the working environment, or perhaps a short-lived destiny in retail; owning a jeans store. I don't know why I never thought of this before, but while watching "A Makeover Story" on TLC (shut up, it's my lunch time ritual) it suddenly hit me, and was like, "Omfg this is the coolest idea ever." So I need to think of some good names. Not anything corny like Bean's Jeans, or trendy like Da Sweetest Jeans in Da Hood (because frankly a business would fail miserably no matter what is sold with a name like that). Something hip yet classic is the cure.

Da sweetest commenters in da hood: Johnny Crash, RJA, Michelle, May...you guys are keepers. :)

Last night I had a dream that I wrote the coolest blog entry ever. But to my dismay it never materialized into the conscience world. And I can't quite remember what it was about. For some reason elephants are coming to mind.

No one visits this side anymore. It's sad.

I missed the Elvis movie w/Jonathan Reese Myers. His lips are amazing. I want to be his Valentine (and take that whichever way you want to, ha).

Have you ever wanted something sugary (or any food for that matter) so bad but when you finally eat it, it is just run of the mill and doesn't live up to your sugary dreamy thoughts? BUT THEN you keep doing that and each time you are let down, again and again but you STILL crave it even with knowing the end results. Shit's weird like that.

Helloooo friends. I got my hair cut today. She curled in loose curls so it's all fun and bouncy. And it smells really nice. I contemplated buying the products because lately my hair and been dry and damaged but I didn't want to be set back 2398472984729374 dollars. So I bought a white skirt at Old Navy instead. That justification doesn't work but whatev.

This weekend I'm going to attempt to make a home-made frappuccino. Those things are the shit. (God...it's only Monday..NOO).

So I got to thinking earlier this afternoon, when I'm employed I'm going to blow my first paycheck on over-priced but good quality hair products and make up. It's nice to pamper yourself once in a while.

I have designed a new layout but am not sure if I could put it up quite yet. What are your thoughts? Yes? No?


lmfao That is a classic. This guy's good.

I need someone to show me how to love.

My hot, tall love interest at Trade Joe's has a girlfriend. :( I heard the news today when he was talking about her to the customer in front of us. So I was all depressed and melancholy when he asked us how we were. But then he looked and me and was like, "How are YOU? I just want to see you smile!" I immediately feel out of my depression and was like, "I LOVE YOU. LET'S GO TO THE FROZEN FOOD DEPARTMENT AND MAKE OUT."

My jeans and necklace from Guess came in the mail today. They are perfecto (glam shots appearing soon hah). I bought some Acrylic paint supplies today to continue my "hands-on" art approach. I figured it's better to spend time doing something creative than wasting time watching TV or surfing the net.

Listening to Soft Cell's "Tainted Love" makes me want to dress in 80's retro digs with polka-dots, oversized white glasses, and accents of hot pink and neon green.

Taylor Hanson needs to stop procreating for the good of this world. I wouldn't be surprised if this one came out of his uterus this time around haha.

This makes me drool everytime I see it.

Attention: Affiliates Wanted Inquire here.

www.saveourvalley.com

Mt. Bachelor was rad (gotta love the 80's lingo). It was by far the best snowboarding I've done..I've got mad skills, yo. The trails are much better than Willamette, PLUS I rode off the lift 5/6 times instead of falling. I felt so accomplished. Snow wasn't that bad either. Got 6 great runs in which is amazing considering I usually do 4, and adding to the fact that I'll be turning pro next year *cough*. Also, I want this board (154) and some new riding duds.

Senioritis is a killer. It's affecting all of my joints and is quickly spreading to the outer extremities. My motivation is completely wiped out. Which reminds me, I didn't even wipe out on the mountain. Okay...maybe a half-biff (but that doesn't count).

There's a spot on my neck that's dry.

Dear Ideal Roommate,
Please contact me ASAP because everyone else is unfit and/or are dimwits.
LOOOOOVEEE,
Ash

Dear Opportune Summer Job,
Please hire me so I cane get out of the house. I don’t smell (all the time) and have an amazing knack for blue jeans, dorky life philosophies and fruit smoothies.
Lots of hugs and kisses,
Ashley

"Zen And The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance" is an intriguing book; one that needs to be read hundreds of times before you can appreciate the profound words. I think I shall buy it used and highlight it to my hearts content. *whips out bright pink highlighter* Ahaha I really need to get out more.

FYI, the new "recover post" feature on Blogger is a BLOG SAVER. Oy vay!

And RJA, all this time I thought a powerstash was some fancy electronic...

New layout, I glamed it up a little. Word. Now it will only be a matter of mintues before I grow tired of this. So sick and so very, very tired.

Starting next week and continuing for the rest of the school year I'll be getting out at 10:20. Yes, that's in the morning. I have no idea what the frick to do with my extra time. The job market doesn't seem to want me and homework is virtually non-existant.

...facial itching, doh! The Cortizone for the allergic reaction rash instructs me to "not put directly in rectum by using fingers or any mechanical device." Damnit! I shouldn't have used those forceps.

My make up was professionally done for senior pictures yesterday, and this morning I woke with little bumps all over my face. Stupid scented foundation *grumbles*. My skin is uber sensitive (HA uber..). I have the greatest luck ever haha.

I need to find a roomie for next year. The girl who I was going to room with bailed out and is going to another school. The other girls I've been talking to are nice but aren't the best match. I don't want to get screwed over with a crappy dorm and a crappy roommate.

I feel like going to Greece right now. Anyone up for an adventure?

I feel utterly and completely disgusting. My skin is not cooperating..the new pimples meds were "supposed" to help, but are really fighting it. Granted I don't have the worst acne case in the world (one word of advice: don't type in 'acne' on Google pictures. SICK), but still. My hair is lifeless. I need a new, fresh cut. You can't have the same haircut for 4 god damn years and NOT get bored of it!

[end complaining because that seems like it's all I ever do]

Randomly found my prom dress online while looking at a friend's. It's more burgundy in real life but it would be hot if it were more raspberry like in that picture.

Oh, THESE ARE THE MOST DISGUSTING SHOES ON EARTH. Why the frick do people of all ages insist in wearing them? They are even uglier on the foot for god's sakes. And parents are subjugating their poor babies who can't even speak for themselves to wear these sick excuses for shoes. This is a sad, sad time we live in.

Feeling: exanimate

Hey hey heey! That was supposed to sound like Fat Albert, by the way. I'm back from Hawaii, slightly tan, and depressed that I have to go back to normal life in the cold. The North Shore of Oahu is amazing. The perfect amount of tropical beauty, surfers and tourists, being it one of the best places to surf in the world. Hale'iwa is that quint beach town that is relaxing and amusing at the same time. They even have random wild chickens walking about. I hope that place stays the same forever. Some things should never change. Oh, I also hanged ten a couple of time. But on a foam surf board tehehe. Surfing is way fun.

I like flying over cities at night, the lights are so entertaining...I'm kind of like a crow that sees something shiny.

Blaaaghhh. You know that feeling when you've eaten too much of a bad thing? It's not pleasant. Too many chicken strips and jo-jo's are never a good thing. Quite delicious at the beginning but 10 mintues later one finds oneself in an unhappy situation for the next hour.

My senior pictures are on April Fool's Day. I am confident this guy will do better than the last. I want to get a cute dress but after the shoot it would hang lifelessly in my closet because sadly, I have no one to wear it for (except on those late nights with Tha Graw aka Gavin DeDraw).

Have a fabulous week! Fun the sun here I come.

Please, send your good weather omens my way so it will follow me to Hawaii. It's currently raining there :\ Hopefully a sunny front will appear by the time this weekend rolls around. It is sad that I'm already packed? I started last week haha. Okay, yeah...that is sad.

Anyone have any ideas to revive Art Club? As "co-prez" I really should know these things...

Hm, I already feel an urge to put up a new layout.

Zac Hanson is engaged. Yes friends, he is officially off the market. So now I will be targeting Mackenzie. Buwhahaha. Sick.

Hello there, strangers. It's been a while hasn't it? A few things have changed since we last talked:
-Got accepted into OSU and am currently corresponding with a few roommates
-Currently submitting scholarships and searching for a job
-Saw Matt Nathanson in concert (amazing) and met him
-Attended The One Tree Hill Tour in Ptwon, met Tyler Hilton and Gavin DeGraw, witnessed a life-chaing performance by Gavin (my love)
-Purchased my first real DVD, Garden State and fell in love with Zach Braff
-Used a free 1 month gym membership
-Tanned a total of 4 times in prep for Hawaii
-Ate Thin Mints

Whew. Semi-short list, but good times. Hope you like the new layout. I saw that John Mayer picture and knew it was destined for a layout. The texture is by somebody who I forget, so credit goes to that unknown talent. Updates to 1st celeb crush, Bootylicious Boys, About Me, LJ Icons, Fashion Sense, My Music, Quotes. Sorry for the downtime. I expected to be back sooner but L-E was having server problems and eventually decided to close. But Unpredictable is back and under the wing of Rain at Eidas.org!

I've recently been inspired by a few people, Matt Nathanson and Gavin DeGraw. Truly incredibly musicans and people. Gavin, my husband, knows how to rock. I haven't felt music like that ever. You could actually feel the rush of energy and emotion surge through your body. It was difficult going back to life after seeing them live. The hard hit of reality hurt (even though I am still slightly high on Gavin and must write my review asap).

Sometime you need a few drinks to fall in love...

Today I realized that I don't know how to have fun. I mean, I know how to have fun, but not real, genuine fun. I can when I'm around others who know how to but I've never really learned how to have an accessive amount of good time. I don't think its no so much learning as it is just being around it. So actually, I've never been around real fun throughout the entire span of my life. It seems weird to think about this, but that's what I want my life to be. Sometimes I take shit too seriously. It would be nice to be goofier, but not to the point of immaturity. Once I step back at look at the situation I see that whenever I'm around people who are naturally reserved I tend to get bored and metamorphesize into that quiet way of life. But when I'm around the constant unpredictableness and humor of a funny person, I change into that. Mentally and emotionally it feels so much better and clearer to laugh and play around a little. Hopefully in the continuing years of my life I will meet more people who improve me instead of deteriorate me (and my spirit).

Even though the site is on hiatus and no one can see this right now, I felt I needed to get the following out anyhow.

My friend, who is now deeply religious, is refusing to read an assigned book because the group who controls and brainwashes these fictional people is not God. Now I understand that because if you don't want to read something because it is against your beliefs, by god then don't. And its awesome she is standing up for what she thinks, but for one, it is a book and it is not going to harm you be to cultured. If I were assigned a devoutly religious text, as much as I wouldn't want to read it, I would anyway to learn something new and understand the beliefs of others (Then again, I'm a book whore). I wanted to tell her but refrained because I'm not one to start face to face skirmishes.

We're starting to read Hamlet in Lit. Shakespeare is eeevil. I hate reading his plays, though listening is bareable at times (only with skilled actors). Many people claim that he "invented" thousands of words and sayings, but I don't dare give credit to purely one man for all of that work. He might have been the first to write it down, but not speak it all of it. Many of "his sayings" were probably language he heard on the street and so on. But on come, one man cannot have that much literary and language power. There must be some other explaination! Over the years, words could have been changed with each performance by different actors, etc. There is so much error in written and spoken language. Sometimes I wish we could communicate only with our emotions, eyes and body language. It seems so much more pure and true.

I finished my OSU application..sent it in yesterday. Oh the joys of online apps. Now to my Petit Prince rough draft that I've out off until the last mintue...