Green Macbooks!

Apple introduces green notebooks. It's about time! I want to get my hands on one of these babies to replace my poor, ailing (okay, old) Mac. This is so exciting. The impact of this on the computer world is HUGE! Within the next 2-3 years, all computers will be made like this or even better. Yes, minimizing waste and harmful compounds is a step in the right direction but eliminating them is even better. All this and more is in Cradle to Cradle (my other bible, next to He's Just Not That Into You), a great read for anyone who plans on living.

Coooold

It's 59 degrees in my room right now. It was probably colder in last year's apartment but my technologically advanced space heater has a digital thermostat to warn me of the coldness that lurks outside.

I got my second holes pierced in my lobes last night and taught people how to spray paint this afternoon. My cash funds are dwindling and I need some extra spending money. Today's paper said that the sensory lab on campus pays people for taste testing. Tempting. I've also thought about nude modeling for the art department. Not quite sure how to get in on that though.

Flawed

Well, I found my first flaw: my right shoulder is slightly lower than my left. It's most likely due to carrying my heavy school bag on my right shoulder for 5+ years. This could lead to back and neck pain later in life. My roommate and her friend discovered this while practicing for their university class. In the midst of all this perfection, can you believe it? (Ha, kidding.) The some-what lengthy reversal process will begin tomorrow with my bag gracing the left shoulder. Thankfully I have good posture, so that will help too.

There are a few potential men out there but nothing at the formal stage yet. :\

I ate two brauts for dinner tonight. They were delicious and temporarily filled my hot dog craving due to lack of man meat for almost a year. But as mentioned before, I'd rather be celibate than have some random penis in me.

Twilight comes out in less than 4 days! And yes, we bought tickets for the midnight showing.

Boots without the fur

So, I gave in. I bought them. Skinny jeans and a pair of brown boots. And I absolutely love them. The concept works very well in the rainy Pacific Northwest. My pants stay completely dry, even while wearing flats. One thing I will never do: Uggs.

Is fruit leather a nutritious food? Or one of those foods made to look healthy?

Apparently I'd been under watering my orchid, so the leaves are becoming wrinkly. Let's hope it's not too late to save it...it's a slippery slope out there in the plant world.

I'm seriously considering studying abroad in France this summer. It has to happen!

Yes we did

Obama Nation!

EDIT // This is still very emotional even three days after. I'm also so proud of us young people who showed up in records numbers and comprised almost 20% of the popular vote.

Good Dick

I'm dying this movie when it comes near me/out to video:



Shamefully (or proudly?), the girl reminds me a lot of myself. The synopsis makes so completely excited to see it. I feel it has the potential to make it to the all-time favorite list.

Cactus update

It died.

:(

Fierce farter

I just blew the loudest, most massive, Guinness Book of World Records-worthy fart known to mankind and no one was around to witness it!! It came out with such force that it hurt my butt.

Earlier this afternoon, I was consumed by pavement claustrophobia. Everywhere I turned, the ground was covered. Panicked, I walked along the wild grass blocks between the sidewalk and the road to calm my nerves. I'm surmising this happened because I haven't hiked for over a month or so.

Something I've never understood: leaf blowers. Why? Let the wind do it's job. And if people slip on wet leaves from time to time, so be it. They probably had it coming to them anyway.

My cactus has mealy bugs! Hence the leaves falling off and white residue. Poor little guy (Frederic Edwardo the third).

And it makes me wonder

I've been meaning to write for sometime now...

Coming back to school has been good, although I've been feeling a bit sad and lonely as of lately. I swear our apartment bathroom was made for little people, or at least very short ones. Everything is so low. I almost broke the toilet the first time I sat down.

The other week I had a hazelnut steamer with hemp milk. It was quite delicious. And being a strong supporter of all things hemp, it made me enjoy it that much more.

I had a nice day to myself not too long ago. On a drizzly but humid day after class, I ventured downtown and rummaged around the hippie bead shop and discovered a new/used bookstore. I bought a few books about Buddhism and some of Walt Whitman's works. The teachings of Buddhism have recently become more attractive to me, as I now have multiple books, meditate on occasion and try to practice everyday. Buddhism is quite a learning process of training the mind. It would be nice to have some sort of instruction, especially since campus life is preaches quite the opposite of Buddhist ideals. I'm thinking of contacting my Philosophy teacher from a few years ago. Continuing with my gravitation towards Buddhism, I went to a lecture on campus given by Robert Thurman about his new book, Why The Dalai Lama Matters. One of the greatest speakers I've had the pleasure to see. Not only is he very intelligent and inherently compassionate but he cracks hilarious jokes...and snorts at them! He described the Dalai Lama as a "zoloft of the people" haha. He was very inspirational and uplifting.

My Halloween costume is all assembled and Fern, my inner hippie, is ready to spread peace, love and the amazingness that is Led Zeppelin. I'm super excited! All I need is a Jimmy Page as my companion.

On Wednesday I became one of the editors of the art and literary magazine on campus. :) A passion for art runs deep in my veins and this is the perfect opportunity. I will be judging student works to be published in our quarterly.

Just last week I was walking to campus on a sun-drenched but crisp morning. I looked up to see bright yellow leaves blowing off a tree and into the wind, juxtaposed against the blue sky. It was a highly spiritual moment. I walked to class a little slower that day.

A change is gonna come

Viagra emails are somehow getting through my amazing spam filter and are showing up in my inbox. Angry face.

Today was my last day of work until the holiday season. I'm going to miss a lot of people there, everyone was so nice. One of the girls even made me a card. :) There was a lot of diversity at "big box". It will be sombering to return to OSU and be surrounded by relative sameness.


I know I've turned over a new leaf with accepting commitment and relationships when toasting to "love" completely drunk. :)

The seasons are changing, as the scent of Fall blows freely in the wind. This makes me uncomfortable because it's come up so suddenly. I'm not ready to accept Fall. Summer has been so grateful to me.

Beer

In my new experience of legal drinking, I've decided that Widmer Brother's Hefeweizen is my favorite beer on tap. Delicious.

Flattery

I've been working at Target for a little over two months and I've already trained two people and been in charge for half the store on multiple occasions. Last night, after hearing sad news (below), the store leader said he would like for me to become a manager and to stay with Target even after I graduate. He loves my positive and friendly attitude, he "knows a great team lead when he sees one". It was very flattering but my dreams are bigger. At least I know I'll always have a job and a reference.

The past couple of days I'd been having very strong premonitions that something bad was going to happen to someone I know. These feelings intensified yesterday mid-morning. Whenever a feeling like this comes along, it's always right. Consequently, last night at work I learned that my motorcycle-riding crush was in a bad motorcycle accident around lunch time, leaving him unable to walk for at least four months. My heart dropped to the floor. He is one of the nicest guys and to have this happen to him is shocking. We'd been talking this entire summer and our mutual attraction had been growing. This whole thing is very upsetting to me. All I want to do is see him, hear his voice, touch his face and kiss his lips. We've never even kissed (although there have been many conversations about it haha)! Everything is going to be so between with us now. Not seeing him at work is going to be very weird too. He's honestly part of this reason I enjoy working there. Obviously I've been suppressing feelings for him. No surprise there...

My heterosexual life partner Whitney is in France for the term and I missss her :(.

Hanson was amazing. The sold out crowd was energetic, friendly and mature. I think they were shocked at the energy of the NW fans that they've neglected to visit these past five years. Hanson's humanitarian efforts are also inspiring and commendable.

The word "cattery" was in the newspaper this morning. I found it so amusing that I want to include it in my vocabulary. Get thee to a cattery!

The boys are back in town

Only a few weeks left until I return to school and our apartment. The porch right outside of my bedroom is the perfect place to set my easel for outside artistry. I'm super excited but I don't want summer to end quite yet.

In the midst of summer activities of friends and flirts, I forgot to mention that I'm going to see Hanson perform tonight in Portland. It is about 5 years ago to date that I met them backstage at the Aladdin. How times have changed.

I may be getting myself into some trouble with a certain male but everyone needs a little trouble from time to time.

Every time my cactus is watered, it loses a leaf. I'm worried. Am I a bad plant owner?

I cannot turn my mind off to fall asleep!!

Keep on rockin'

My art class has opened my eyes to the versatility of charcoal. What was once my enemy has now become my best friend. I absolutely love working in this medium and plan to buy all the essential supplies.

Driving back from my final art class at the beloved hippie campus of UO, there was a guy strumming his electric guitar on the street corner. "Keep on rockin'!" he yelled enthusiastically. The poor guy wasn't getting any response, so as I drove by I threw up the devil's horns (for all things rock 'n roll) and made a hardcore rocker face. He was so excited and yelled ecstatically, "Rock on!! WOO!" I think we made each other's nights.

Michael Phelps and Ryan Lochte. It's a beautiful thing. Not to mention their swimming skills are exceptional. Lochte is is a gorgeous man, reminiscent of an ancient Greek. My mouth literally falls open and an "ooohhh" escapes while looking at pictures and/or watching him on TV. He is a gift from the Greek gods.

Oh! I was stung by a bee while on a bike ride with some friends this afternoon. Something dark and buzzing suddenly collided with my neck, followed by a dull, stinging pain. Only random, crazy things like that happen to me.

Natural paradox

The longer I go without sex, the more and more I crave hot dogs. Not the pathetic Ball Park Frank kind but the big, juicy Bratwurst kind. Pretty soon, brats are the only thing I'm going to be eating!

I have the sudden urge to make a glowstick dress and wear it to a rave, preferably a European rave.

EDIT // My new planner has a quote for each week. It's really nice.

My 21er was an epic event, spanning two cities in two weekends with many friends and too many free drinks.

I'm getting new glasses to replace my 8 year old pair à la Harry Potter. I've narrowed it down to three pairs, although the Gucci ones are my favorite.

The other day I realized one of my greatest fears is to end up on one of those dating websites.

Major crisis

My boobs have gotten smaller and I don't know why!! AHH! I'm angry, sadden and I feel like I have lost a part of myself. It must have something to do with a lack of man action. I'd rather have smaller boobs than be a slut. An actual relationship would be nice though. In time...only in time.

I jumped off a 30 foot bridge at Blue River Reservoir this afternoon. Then lounged around drinking cheap beer at the dock. Such a wonderful day, despite my coming to terms with a breast crisis.

The Dark Knight was great. Heath Ledger completely makes the film. A definite must-see.

Summer treats

Champagne mangoes are delicious and so are iced Tazo Passion teas infused with lemonade from Starbucks.

Pain au chocolat

In the past couple of months I've had numerous dreams about traveling to France. Many of which involve a dramatic scene a at pastry shop where I buy something chocolate.

Currently I'm reading "Sucidial Planet" in hopes to get everyday tips to become more eco-friendly. They argue that "every little bit helps" doesn't actually help. I beg to differ, every bit does help, especially if many participate. It may not be enough but at least it is something. I do concur that drastic change is needed soon to alleviate the strain we are putting on the planet. I'm scared for the future condition of our world.

I've always felt a strange connection to the Native Americans tribes in the Pacific Northwest. I would like to think that I was part of one in a past life.

Since being home, occasional feelings of being stifled have overwhelmed me due to the near impossibility of biking from place to place and the loss of freedom that comes from living on one's own. Curfew...really mom, really?

I've frequently been getting hit on (even at work by customers) by every man except the one who I really want. He's only been hinting at it. He melts my heart like butta.

We stood at easels in art class this evening and my drawing turned out crooked.

The clouds outside my window look like the ones from "The Simpsons".

Snickers sandwiches

I need to find "my place". You know, that one spot where you go alone to contemplate life and feel better. That will be my mission the next couple of weeks.

Exactly one more month until my 21st birthday.

Snickers Ice Cream Brownie Sandwich = SO GOOD. The closest thing to sex. Definitely an orgasm in the mouth.

If the fish swam out of the ocean

Over the weekend I helped Katie move to Portland and holy crap, there are some crazy people who live there! Love it...so much diversity (not just about ethnicity in this context) and activity! I've never gotten so many shouts and hollers in my life. I even had an admirer at Waterfront Park who kept skateboarding by and smiling. It was actually quite cute. I think I could live in the city for a while until nature would beckon me back. Also, Portland's "naked bike ride" is now on my list of life goals. They organize secretly due to the illegality, so I must find my way in.

Another thing on the to-do list: get a fart ringtone and have someone call me in class so it would go off and no one would suspect it was a phone!! It sounds ridiculous, I know, but the thought completely amuses me.

I'm obsessed with Sam Sparro at the moment, especially "Black & Gold," which talks about the absurdity of life. He is even political and forward thinking. I'd be a gay man for him.

I bought a "stunning" floor length gown today for no purpose at all except to have it. Sarah talked me into it and I couldn't refuse because it fits beautifully. Now I just need some sort of a ball to wear it to. And a Prince Charming. :)

Last year I had a crush on my Math TA and we had a tentative date for coffee that never happened. He recently contacted me again and asked if we could hang out, also adding that I was "very attractive" and was wondering what I thought of him. How awkward! I know he is foreign but there are no excuses.

Oh Ryan, my possible love interest rides a motorcycle.

EDIT // Another goal: Nude beach! There are many spots around Eugene. How exciting! Eugene also has a nude bike ride but like Portland's, I just missed it.

EDIT 2 // Goals: learn how to play the bongos and play them with the other drummers at the Saturday Market, go topless with body paint at the Oregon Country Fair

Covered in rain

The air was warm this evening and I went out on the balcony to let the rain hit my skin. I tipped my head back and allowed the sprinkles cover my body, becoming one with the purity of nature. Surrounded by friends and the fresh smell of a new rain (and a few cute men) made the night delightful.

I won $50 on a scratch-it the other day.

You had me at shabby chic

Pottery Barn. As much as I hate it, I love it. Their perfect, mass-produced products...I can't help it! I secretly wish to subscribe to their catalog for all of the design ideas, cut them out and paste them in my inspiration binder. What a hypocrite I am! I will admit to nobody else that I like this place or I will keel over in disgust and guilt.
(Feeling: shameful)

A lone blossom

One more final to go and Junior year is done. It has been an interesting experience living with Marie and Whitney. I don't suggest having three roommates because there is always "odd man out". In this case, it was Marie. Not because we purposely left her out but because she constantly alienated herself. Unfortunately, we only recently had a conversation to resolve everything. I'm definitely going to miss living with Whitney and the CAT! Oh kitty. It will be so lonely without her. The greatest thing is, our craziest nights have been sober nights. House hunting for next year is a disaster. With the way things are going, Marie and I might be homeless next year. What else? My life continues to be romantically uninteresting. The most exciting it gets is flirting and lots of chocolate. But I'm content...and maybe a little apathetic at times. Now back to Eugene for hopefully a wonderful summer (even though Katie will be in Portland)!

My Japanese Peace Lilly has bloomed again this year:

Haworthias and merde

I purchased a small Haworthia succulent from the Saturday Market today. This will make plant number six. I'd forgotten how fun and relaxing an afternoon at the market is, especially here in Eugene.

My cousin's husband works at a high-end, sustainable architecture firm in Portland where he most likely would've given me a summer Interior Design internship. For some reason, my parents and myself included, regrettably talked me out of it because I didn't have enough experience or a portfolio. They said it "wouldn't be worth" living up there to file papers or do other meaningless tasks all day. But really it would be worth it. It would get my foot in the door.

Merde!

I'm worried that I'm not sufficiently design-oriented. I don't sketch ideas...or have too many ideas in general. Is that bad? Yes. That deserves another "merde". If I had a premise or reason for sketching, that would help me along. Meaning, I need to start looking at spaces and thinking of ways to recreate them. Oh god! I'm not so scared about not good enough as much as I'm scared that my designs won't be original or revolutionary. Breathe in, breathe out and go buy some interior architecture and design magazines. (Not only do I talk to myself in real life, I do it in blogs now too. haha Yesss.)

Sweet puddle of juice

I'm typing this blog with while almost naked. Feels so great. I really think I could join a nudist colony and be comfortable.

I have a predicament with housing for next year: either live with two girl whom I know I wouldn't be very happy with, or live by myself for three months until Whitney comes back from France. Either way doesn't seem like very much fun. I'm in limbo.

Story time! There was a sticky puddle on the kitchen counter this morning. Out of disgust, I cleaned it up but it was back by the afternoon. Perplexed, I searched around for a leak in the ceiling or any problem. Nothing. I sniffed the mysterious puddle only to find it was sweet smelling. My eyes met with the nearby fruit basket and spied the culprit, a rotten tangerine dripping it's juice onto the counter.

She's free

That's it, I'm transferring to UO! I've always been an inner hippie but going to the campus yesterday to made me want to fully embrace it. The majority of OSU seems to be caught up in a superficial rat race. I'm restricted there. I don't realize how much I move with the crowd in until I'm removed from it. I felt free and relaxed on the UO campus. Being amidst people who also have organic souls, I felt quite at home. I'm not going to let my surrounding dictate how I feel or what I do, so OSU...expect a full-blown hippie coming Monday.

Obama's speech was enriching. Though seemingly tired, he was still inspiring. He is definitely a uniter whereas Hillary is more of a policy-maker. The McCain bashing was annoying, that is one thing I dislike about politics. But I like his direction of more affordable higher education and a healthier international environment. I also locked eyes with the most beautiful man I have ever seen. He had glowing olive skin with hazel green eyes and was even hippie-ish. I must see him again.

Hopefully I will secure a job shadow with an interior designer here in Eugene for the summer. In addition I've decided to take drawing and painting classes at UO...do the whole starving artist thing, spending my extra time reading, biking, hiking, playing tennis, etc. Just enjoying life and not having a strict schedule. Thus keeping with my flowy lifestyle.

I'm creating myself as how I want to be, a free and creative soul that is kind, content and hopefully one day, selfless. I like this. :)

No more hot pink water bottle

My Nalgene lid melted in the dishwasher. Now it smells like a pair of freshly waxed skis...not the greatest scent for a dishwasher. :\

I'm officially in the Interior Design program. It seems like much more than a year ago that I decided to switch my major. A few friends and I are going to see Obama tomorrow at UO. It's my first time seeing a presidential hopeful speak, so I'm super excited. This should help me decide who to vote for.

I've been uncomfortably cold and sweaty all day.

Quality in a square

Today, I ate an entire package of Ritter Sport's Milk Chocolate with Hazelnuts.

Buff girl

Yes, yes I'm here to blog! Stephanie reminded me it has been over a month (ah!). I'm not really sure where the time went. Just school, friends...nothing crazy. Life is good but maybe a little lonely at times.

Whistler was gorgeous (so many people)! I signed up for group lessons but it ended up being just me and the instructor. I can actually turn now but am still having some trouble with the toe-edge. The true test is if I can carry my new-found skills into next season.

I bought some peace sign panties a few weeks ago and am excited to wear them.

I'm getting buff! It's true. With tennis two times a week plus other activities at the gym, biking and running outdoors, I'm frequently flexing and admiring my muscles in the mirror. Haha.

3 more months until my 21er. :)

PS: I'm even biking to the organic grocery store. How I love being natural...

New and somewhat fresh

In a little more than 12 hours, I will be in Canada (Yes Ryan, Stephanie and Alex, it is true. How are you guys, by the way?). I've never been to Canada and am eager at the chance to possibly speak French...and buy Canadian candy and pretend that I'm not American for a second or two. The snowboard instructor at Whistler will hopefully teach me a thing or two. As of right now, my skills are horrible!

New layout too. Not quite what I had imagined but a change was needed and I was too lazy to make something spectacular. Plus green is always refreshing. I always feel like I can smell the color green, usually orange too. Brain associations are crazy.

EDIT // To all those having trouble viewing the layout, hopefully things are fixed. Let me know if not.

Soiled bathrobe

Coffee is not a good thing to drink when I am stressed. It make me even more anxious, crazy and sweaty. Bathrobes are also not a good thing for me to wear, let a lone anyone, while using the toilet. Weird things happen. Ehh...

I'm glad for the large window in my room. So much natural light.

I have a tentative blind date. Although the "blind" part once you visit their Myspace. Luckily mine is private, it keeps the mystery.

This is the orchid my parents gave me. Beautiful! Hopefully I can keep it alive long enough for it to grow a stem and bloom.

Foot stench

It's important to listen to that saying, "Never shop when you are hungry." Today I came away with a box of chocolate donettes, dark chocolate covered biscuit cookies, two burritos, chocolate soy milk, chips and ohhh a few healthy things.

The other day I borrowed a friend's sneakers to play tennis and little did I know that they reeked like feet. Foot oder is on my list of "Worst smells in the world." But before I found out, I slipped on my own shoes. A few hours later, I took them off only to discover that my feet and (newly awesome) shoes also reeked! I've been diligently washing my feet and shaking Gold Bond Foot Powder into them, in hopes that the rank smell will dissipate.

Last week I took my gloves out of my school bag, seeing as the weather had changed. But alas, this week has called for the gloves to be put back in the bag for immediate use. Sun...come back!

:)

Since I stopped taking birth control a few weeks ago, I feel so much more...normal! And happier, sexier and vibrant. It probably has something to do with my new look on life as well. No matter what the cause, it is absolutely fabulous. Now I just need a good lay. Please? Please!! They should add "uncontrollable horniness" to the side effects of coming off birth control.

That is all.

New soul

I highly enjoy the T-mobile commercials where the guys tries to leave the perfect message for a girl but is all awkward and funny.

Things with Travis and I are over. Details are unnecessary because it's in the past. I'm leaving behind all of my emotional baggage from the past 2 years and starting fresh (and so clean). No more living in the past. I have a different destination now with more confidence and sass. There will be no more "dating," only serious relationships. I want something with substance and love. This may mean staying abstinent for a while (which is a shame because this sexy body should be getting laid! haha) but it's for my own good. I'm excited to start my new journey. This is the most free I've felt in a long time.

He's thinking (?): "Hey sexy lady, it was nice to know you but I got to move on"

Apparently, it is over with Travis. He's suddenly done a 180 personality change and stopped talking to me despite my efforts. It leaves me utterly confused and hurt. Things between us were so good last term. I want to call him out on it. He can't expect to treat me like that and get away with it. Maybe it is his new party-crazy roommates. Maybe he doesn't have enough balls to say he doesn't want to date exclusively. It could be anything. We probably weren't mean tot be. A part of me thinks I liked him simply because it was an easy way to stop thinking about Don. Travis was my rebound guy. I'm more upset and hurt that yet another "thing" did not unfold into a relationship, and that another guy treated me poorly. I have such horrible luck with men.

I was watching re-runs of Scrubs this evening and JD said, "People weren't meant to be alone." It's true. I sulked for a little bit as I reflected on my own pathetic situation. Single life is not fun. Nor is dating someone who you cannot trust. I have yet to figure out which is worse. At least being single you aren't stressed and paranoid about what your significant other might be doing behind your back.

...But miss waking up to him with his arms around me. His touch made me feel accepted. I hope that sometime we start talking again because I don't want to loose his friendship. And he was hella fun to party with.

Lately I've been feeling very self-conscious. Not so much with my looks but with my personality. I don't know how to explain it but it's fucking weird.

It snowed a couple of inches today and we didn't go out to play. Hopefully it will still be there tomorrow because I desperately want to make a snow angel. It's been years since that's happened!

Also, I will be turning 21 in 6 months and two days! Yeeah.

Date with an ass-plant

The slopes ungraciously welcomed me today. The sun turned to clouds and my smile into screams of frustration. My snowboard glared at me in anger. I scowled back. The mountain against me. No, me against the mountain. Anger at my lack of skill led to inability to enjoy the mountain's beauty. The wind breathed hard. It let out wet snow that met my face like ice. I returned to the truck and found one of my boots had broken. Another sign. I should have stuck to skiing all of these years. At this point in my life, I would've been damn good.

The black shirt I wore on New Year's stained my favorite bra that cost almost $50. What once looked new, now looks dirty and worn. God damn Oxy Clean didn't do a thing.

EDIT // The "Oldies" station has stopped playing "all of your favorite hits from the 50's and 60's" and is now playing shit from the 80's. What the hell?

We're jammin' (and I hope you like jammin' too)

2008...Hangovers are fun. This nasty one didn't go away until 5 this evening. I hippie-danced like crazy last night! Oh it was fantastic. Lately I've taken up socially smoking with a natural substance that is not cigarettes. But one cannot call oneself a real hippie without participating in smoking this herb, I guess. Now I feel the need to get some sort of Bob Marley paraphernalia and hang it up in my room. Maybe a Rasta shrine or two throughout the house. A penis-shaped pipe. Hahaha.

With all this talk of herbs and reggae, I've seemingly forgot about what else there was to blog about.