A receipt to the past

I was cleaning my file folder this evening and discovered that receipts brought me back to the time and place of that purchase. The feelings, the mood, the event, the people, even the weather. It is like an unintended diary.

(con't on September 25...)

A friend and I from elementary school met up for dinner the other night. We had not seen each other in over 7 years. After all that time we still found something to laugh and talk about, even shared our liking of the same type of men.

Speaking of men, hardcore partying on Saturday proved that my mojo is oooon (maybe not now that I have a disaster of a hair color, refer below)! Despite the number of guys who wanted to make out with me, I did not kiss any of them. It seemed so disgusting and unfulfilling. It was only fun a few times freshman year. I need something real.

Hair disaster, part 2:
Going back and forth from "fix it" to "keep it," I decided to do the former. She toned it down, in which some of the formerly very blonde highlights turned gray. She then had to strip all of the color toner out of my hair to fix this mistake and re-dye my ENTIRE head. No more natural color, literally! All the fun (but sparse) firey red strands are gone, lost are the abnormally dark browns and the untamed blondes of birth. It now looks like someone pissed on my head. It disgusts me to even glance at it in the mirror. I feel like regurgitating in her face.

A platinum blonde (highlight) life

Lately I've been having very intense dreams, many of which are violent. In my dreams, I angrily yell obscenities to loved ones in raging outbursts, even get into fist fights. Sometimes I wake up with crusty eyes, as if I've been crying. I don't suppress anger during the day, so maybe it is the anxiety of moving and school starting again that has made my dreams become vicious.

It is my last day at home in Eugene before returning to school. So much packing, not enough time! It feels as if this summer went by quicker than any other (but don't we say that every year?). It was a little boring and kind of sad, due to the fact that we didn't go anywhere as a family and the emotional turmoil of a long distance relationship/relationshit.

This afternoon I went to the salon to highlight my hair with blonde in a natural-looking way, just like always. But it is BRIGHT and it is ABUNDANT. I'm supposed to be a cute, natural blonde, not an amateur porn star blonde! There is too much color in the front, framing my face with fake highlights and washing me out. Its saddening because she covered up all of my natural hair color. Now I look like all of the other dumb, blonde bitches.

Hmmm. So I'm excited to go back and party, meet a few boys, flirt a little. Whitney promised that we'd find me some "wiener," even some "romantic wieners". I had no idea such wieners existed. Wiener is a disgusting word. I always associate it with someone jiggling a cold Oscar Meyer wiener, almost as a ritualistic-type dance. Hahaha.

Hopefully Sara and I will go to Prince Puckler's tonight for a delicious ice cream sundae. You haven't experienced life until you've had one of their sundaes.

Goodbye left shoe, float on downstream

The layout is completed and links are working! Blogger has wonderful features. The only thing that saddens me is the fact that I don't have a "Quotes" section anymore. Maybe I should create it as one large blog post...because I do love me a good quote.

Yesterday was a hot summer afternoon as Katie and I climbed upon our innertube to float down the McKenzie River. The weight difference was not ideal for sharing such a flotation device. Needless to say, we got stuck on rocks and couldn't properly paddle our way through without spinning in circles. At the beginning of our adventure I lost my right flipflop by kicking our way off the bank. But 20 minutes downstream, my shoe appeared! It proved to be elusive as we came an arm's length away several times and could never catch the darn thing. It is now lost in the infinite abyss of the river. (And I feel guilty for "littering".)

The other day at work, one of the chefs gave me a scoop of ice cream and asked how it was. A delighted smile appeared on my face, as he compared it to a smile one has right after sex. The satisfaction of good sex and good food is very similar.

It seems as if Don as already moved on to another girl (thank you facebook for allowing me to be stalkerish). I was replaced. Just as I replaced the one before me. I feel alright now but if I ever see him again, I know it will hurt a little. Besides, I deserve much better than him.

PS: Feed should now be available. :) Link is located at the bottom right-hand side.

There's a lot of "almosts" out there

After difficulties with the eidas.org server, I've (temporarily) moved to blogspot. Images and links will be fixed accordingly within the next few days.

To sum up what you've been missing the past few weeks (Alex, Stephanie and Ryan...my loyally insane readers):

-Don and I broke up. He was "kind of" seeing other girls. Coward. I knew from the beginning this would happen but I decided to follow for heart instead of my head for once. What we had was definitely fun (but quite possibly lacking substance), so I hold no ounce of regret. Luckily my heart isn't broken, just fractured and bleeding. I already miss him so much and it completely hurts because I still care about him. It is really painful to know could do that to me, after all of our good memories. Time will heal this. And hopefully someone better will come along. Hopefully one day he'll realize what/who he lost.

The day/night that we hung out before things ended, The Doors were playing in the background. "The End" came on. As the lyrics "This is the end, beautiful friend, this is the end, my only friend" spoke softly through the speakers, it hit me in the deepest pit of my stomach because I knew it was the end. Holding his body through the rest of the song, dread filled mine as I knew it was only a matter of time before we wouldn't be looking into each other's eyes for too much longer.

-I found bedding, woohoo! The sheets are organic and the duvet is cotton sateen with an intricate, pasley print-esque design.

-I was reading my diary from high school the other night and god damn, I was fucking hilarious! Severely lonely and depressed, but funny nonetheless.