Yay I went shopping today. I luff shopping. I didn't find much though. There were so many things that were waaay out of my budget and just a plain rip off lol. I'll go to Portland soon and find some good deals at Forever 21...awesome store. I don't have much to say so this is going to be a usless post. I'm just trying to avoid doing my homework during this nice Thanksgiving break. Damnit! I want t left over turkey sandwhich! But do we have any turkey? Nooo.

This Garfield comic makes me laugh. :)

I've been looking at colleges lately. I know I want to go to a fashion design and merchandising school. The only problem is they are 1/2 year colleges. I want to back myself up with a 4 year university, and also live the college life. I'm thinking maybe going to a 4 year uni., then go to fashion school. I wouldn't know what to major in at the university though. I don't want to become a usless ninie hehe.

I changed the layout around a little bit. The other one was just making me cringe. Let me know how the iFrames work out for you (my first time doing them, woot woot).

David is so fucking hot. Each time I see him I just want to rape that boy! RAWR! Omg and he has the nicest butt ever *wishful sigh*. He was lifting up his pant leg comaparing his leg to some other guys (and of COURSE David's was way better hehe), and wow...he us just lickable. So tan and muscular and damn fine. Ok a little hairy but it works for him. That boy could be wearing a speedo and it could work! Ha ok no. No one and I repeat NO ONE looks good in speedos.

I almost forgot to put deoderant on today. I rushed up stairs before we left to put it on quickly. I managed to get it on my shirt AND in my hair. Don't ask. I washed it off thinking it would go away but nooo I come home from school to find that it was still there. I was walking around all day with deoderant showing visibly on my shirt. haha My coolness amazes me.

New DAMN sexy layout! Heh I dunno about that but I was ready for a change. Tell me what you think. :)

I was scared out of my boots the other morning, here's the story: Innocently eating breakfast and reading the paper, I was stopped in the midst of a chocolatey bite of muffin when I saw the most hideous thing in my whole entire life--Michael Jackson's mug shot. Dear god, they should've warned us! Think of the poor kids! Sometime like "Warning, proceed with caution. The following may cause blindness." hehe

I need to talk to my David lol. Yes, he's mine...GET OFF BITCH! haha Oh lordy. Anyway! As I was walking towards where I usally sit for lunch and he was blatanly staring at me *spanks ass*. It couldn't be more obvious. AND he was sitting by himself. Did I do anything about it? No of course not. Sarah was like "Ashley! He was sitting RIGHT there looking at you and you didn't do anyting!!" *smacks self* I'm stupid.

I got a haircut yesterday. It's a little shorter than I wanted it but that's just as well, the ends were getting dry.

*sings*
Yes I'm grounded
I got my wings clipped
I'm surrounded by all this pavement
Guess I'll circle
While I'm waiting for my fuse to dry

Someday I'll fly
Someday I'll soar
Someday I'll be so damn much more
'Cause I'm bigger than my body
Bigger than my body now
Bigger than my body now

A little late night bloggin for Ash *evil laughter* I'm supposed to be sleeping so SHHH. I can hardly see the keyboard...too dark, man tehe. I'm feeling better today. I just have horrible mood swings. Damn period. Or maybe I'm manic depressive? Ahh CALL THE PHYSCO WARD! Demented Hills! Demented Hills! (Didn't you guys ever see "Good Burger" with Keenan and Kell? *giggle*)

Yesterday morning a guy at my school hung himself. I guess he wasn't fully successful at first before his parents found him and he died two hours later. What a sad loss, he was only 15 years old. That poor boy. If only he knew there was another way out than ending his life. The freaky thing was I heard tons of sirens yesterday morning. :(

I have a new daily, meet Mattie! :) Oh and I forgot to plug Cheryl last time, luff ya!

Ok it's way too dark to type so I'm off! VROOOOOOM

I just got off the phone with Katie. I told her about my "friend delima" and she didn't even care. She was just like "Well...go um..I dunno, do something." She was so insensitive towards my feelings. I have definitely come to the conclusion that everybody think they are better than me and that I am not good enough for anyone anymore. I always felt sorry for loners but I never thought I would become one. What's happening to me? I used to have friends and an unfucked mind.

I have so much lonliness in my life. There's no one offline, out of my friends that I can turn to. I don't feel like anyone truly cares about me. I know people care about me, but no so much in a way that is "Where's Ashley? I want to go to lunch with her." No one ever calls me anymore except for Katie, and that is about homework and boy shit. I call other people but we've lost so much in common that its hard to figure out what to talk about. Then we end up never calling eachother back. I stopped trying because it wasn't getting anywhere.

I used to feel like I fit in. Now I'm just a lonely little shadow that gets unoticed and doesn't know where it belongs. People have shifted their priorties and their friends with out me. It hurts. Its like no one wants to be my friend anymore. It wouldn't be such a be deal if I had a lot of good people who I could talk to, but I don't. I've tried and tried without any results. I'm lost and I don't know how to find myself. If only there was someone to help me.

New layout soon. This one fucking sucks.

Yes I am alive! I've been erhh...busy. Yeah, thats it *looks around*. I've been neglecting this poor little site. I FINALLY got a desk, YAY! No more make-shift box desk hehe. And it's very nice too *pets desk* Although it does make my room even smaller. We had art club yearbook pictures on Friday and our teacher made all of us wear berets hahaha Yeeeaah, we're gonna be the sexiest club there, true DAT. ha I've gone insane. I've been accidently hurting myself lately. I burnt my finger on the god freakin toaster the other day and I did something weird to my hip last night. Humph. I need a cookie hehe :)

My mom and I went to a college fair this weekend and I got an ass load of brochures. There are some AWESOME looking ones from art schools that I grabbed just because I was so interested in the design aspect of them lol. But I did find a few colleges that I want to look into. One in particular, The Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising. They have graphic design, product and store managments, costume design, etc. It was amazing and I'd love to go there...but the only thing is there are so many majors there that I would want to do. I have so many ideas wizzing through my head. Its hard to settle on one.

And thank you to all my commenters. You guys really mean a lot to me :) Thank you. Becca, Cheryl, Mez and Lillian rock.

I cried myself to sleep last night. My dad was yelling yet again and I just couldn't keep my composure and this fucking happy face I put on all the time. I do that just to please others so they won't think anything is wrong with me. And sometimes I DON'T want them to know anything is going on. I'm a very private person and don't like people seeing my weak side.

Things that are evil:
-early morning class
-cold weather
-chemistry (the most usless class I've ever taken)
-being lonely

Things that are good:
-sleep
-chocolate
-cute boys (ie: david)
-hanson (Carnegie Hall this Wednesday--that's right, my boys are legends)

I need to make a new layout. Blah.

SIGN THE GUESTBOOK GOD DAMNIT!! The thing is lonely....go give it a good spankin ;)

Hair-smeller-freaky-boy (haha oh yeah, rockin name) insists on talking to me everytime he sees me. It's umm interesting. While I was talking to him before school today Dale comes up and gives me this huge hug which he rarely does....compeititiiooon oh la la hahaha. Big football game tomorrow and I'm gonna freeze my ass OFF! Seriously I think I will.

I need to stop slacking. My grades aren't as good as I know they can be in a few classes. But when I think about the classes I'm not doing well in are the ones with bad teachers. Go figure. Oooh I'm applying for a scholarship. I have to write a small peom. Wish me luck!

I don't understand this, why am I attracted to so many guys right now? I can name 5 off the top of my head. Stupid thoughts of boys are going to corrode my mind, ack. Maybe its my mating season? rofl

*falls over from reading so much* I just read over a 100 pages of "Black Elk Speaks" in a matter of hours. It was actually a really good book. I suggest it for a different type of reading, if you're in a dream-y sort of mode. The ending is very powerful and I discovered a weird sort of feeling of completeness after reading it. I found a quote out if it that I'm going to share because I "spoke" to me if you will: "It is hard to follow one great vision in this world of darkness and of many great changing shadows. Among these shadows men get lost."

I saw David (aka Mr.EE in some of my previous posts) at the game on friday...my cute little JV football player who is a sophomore! haha Damn he is so cute I just want to smoother him with kisses everytime I see him lmao. Homecoming was last night and it turned out to be fun. Not the greatest dance ever, but I had a good time. I was dancing like a crazy-foo! hahaha David wasn't there though :( Although his friend was...and he is cute in a weird sort of way. He seems really nice too. As Sarah and I were walking out I had my arms crossed and pulled close to me to keep me warm, which in turn made my boobs kinda fall out of my dress haha. And there was this guy sitting in a car, we made eye contact and he smiled and said "Hi," as we were walking past him, so in this sexy voice I'm like "Hiiiiiii." rofl Sarah and I started cracking up! I should've gone back there to talk to him lol.

So I was in the library at school today looking information up about Italy and this dude next to me starts talking to me. He was really nice, trying to make conversationg and stuff. Although it did get annoying when he kept mentioning how many places he'd been and how much money his family has. Uh yeah like I care? Then he was all leaning into me while typing random countries on my computer and smelling my hair. Eww *pushes dude away* I don't think I would've cared WASN'T the guy who kept staring at my friends ass last year. haha

Homecoming this Saturday. Blah, I don't want to go but I got a dress so now I feel obligated. Plus I have so much work to do this weekend and not enough time! Ahh the stress! It's taking over! lol *runs around in circles screaming and pull hair out* Ahhhhhh!


YOU LIVE IN A WALMART BAG!!!

what's YOUR deepest secret?

HAHAHA That's SO me! And thanks to all the commenters on the past few entries, much love for ya! :)

I accidenly O.D. on cold medicine. I took 5 doses instead of 4 in a 24 hour period. I read the directions wrong lol. Well it won't kill me, or at least I hope not! So if you don't hear from me in a long while... (ha ok thats not funny).

I felt so bad when my friend Sara called earlier today. She started to cry because our school won't let her back in since they aren't accepting any transfers right now. She's being homeschooled at the moment, but her guardian isn't teaching her anything. She was like, "I want to learn! I want to have a future!!" It really sucks. I wish I could do something to get her back to school. But I am virtually powerless in this issue (I almost typed tissue hahaha).

God I was so pissed on Saturday during the PSAT. When I registered for it a couple of weeks ago the lady didn't take my name, so I found out that morning they weren't going to count my score. I was like WTF? Isn't that YOUR guys' fault, not mine? So after I bitched about it the guy got it straightened out and my score is gonna count after all. Thank god *grumbles*

I so want to sell this stuff! I could have my friends buy it and I could make some extra cash by doing practically nothing. OMG IDEA....the money that I could get from this could go towards my "Follow Hanson on their next tour with Pee-towners in our Love Mobile with Mr.Jiggles the cat" fund. I should give myself a nice pat on the back for that idea.

PSAT tomorrow. I'm a little nervous....eerrh ok, I'm scared out of my boots! ahaha And its at 8 am in the freaking morning. *grumbles* I want to sleep in god damnit! I'll just have to eat some chocolate before I leave because they is supossed to increase the altertiveness of your brain or something like that.

The street cleaner just went by. The sound turned me on hahaha No not really I just felt like saying that because I'm in a weird mood. Must be the Sudafed Sinus! I think I have a cold. It's like a nasal plug or something....stupid, weird arse cold. Oooh I found out Mr.EE's name today, David. I heard someone calling his name. I haven't "officialy" talked to him yet. My friend Elizabeth's moving away party is tomorrow. I'm sad, I don't want her to move away :(

This entry has been random and pointless. But then again, when are my entries every meaningful? lol

I found out one of my friends is bi the other day. I guess he told some girl who he's friends with and after he left she ended up telling half the people who were at her house. I kinda saw it coming though. There were some clues a long the way...but I just thought he was a little flamboyant. The sad part is everyone thinks he's weird now and he said he'll probably just end up marrying a girl because he doesn't want his family to be ashamed. I feel sorry for the poor guy.

Last night my mom was talking about Pilates and she goes, "Have you ever hear of 'paul-ettes'?" HAHAHA I just started laughing. And I go, "You mean 'pull-aut-ese'?" She was really surprised that you pronounced it that way, so then I convinced her it was "pual-ettes"...she believed me of course then I told her again that it was "pull-aut-ese". hehe I love doing that to people.

Sara said she would do yoga with me, yay! Now I just have to find some cheap place thats close. I have so much homework *groan* Oh and I just want to say that I loath Hanson.net at the moment.

Only things like this happen to me--I volunteered at a refreshment table for a Walk-A-Thon and one of the lady's helping was a man haha. "She" was wearing Jinco jeans, purple nail polish and some really nasty musk perfume. hehe But she was really nice. Then I saw this guy who looked like Josh Hartnett, I was thinking "Rawr *POUNCE*!"...as the refreshment table come crashing down and cheese sticks fly everywhere lol. I can totally see that happening.

I FINALLY heard from my friend Sara who's been "missing in action" for a couple of months. And of course she calls when I'm gone. Tiff talked to her earlier and was telling me a little bit of what happened. Sounded like some serious sheeeot. She didn't tell me everything because Sara wanted to tell me what happened. I hope she's okay. Tiff said she sounded sad :(

I really want to go see "Scary Movie 3" Omfg it looks hilarous....and the Michael Jackson part HAHAHA. Yeah I gotta see this movie. And thank you to everyone who's been commenting the last few entires. :0)

I had the most disgusting burrito for lunch. It was like...bean paste with some sort of cheese substitute. haha What in the world has school a la carte come to? *shakes head* And they except me to pay a while 50 cents more compared to lasat year for an even shitier piece of crap! Humph.

So Tiff and I were supposed to talk to my Ethan Embery look-a-like crush today. Heh thats much harder done than said. She went over and talked to his friend that she knows that was standing with Mr.EE (lol thats what I'm going to call him until I find out his real name) and she motioned for me to come over. Both MR.EE and his friend were looking at me when I was coming over and Mr.EE was following me with his eyes as I was walking towards them. It was so not obvious...But OH YEAH BABY! He's kinda quite though. Maybe my sexiness intimated him. rofl Yeah I bet that was it. So I didn't really talk to him...just his friend. DOH that wasn't the plan! But aw he is so adorable and has a very nice butt. *smacks it and runs away* hehe

On another note, my smurf name is Critically Ill Smurf. LMAO!

SOMEONE MAKE ME STOP PROCRASTINATING GOD DAMNIT! I have an essay to write and I have like 100 words out of 1,000 *smacks head on table*. Tiff and I are going to talk to out Ethan Embry look-a-like tomorrow :D *licks him* haha

Art club is fun. We're painting bowls lol. Mine's seeexy. I love iTunes. I'm really into this Radio thing they have on there. "Beethoven Radio" is amongst my favorites haha. Its relaxing and it helps me study when I'm not putting shit off.

Short entry, nothing to say except I am going to change that the Random Picture right now. Must...refrain..from..putting...up...Zac..Hanson..again.

Today was really good. Nothing special happened though..it was just good. Ok so maybe I talked to the guy I saw yesterday and thought was cute and now I sort of like him hehe :) He reminds me of this actor, Ethan Embry click and click, except with darker hair and eyes and side burn (ooooooOOH MAN!!!). He is such a cutie! Not hot but there is something incredibly adorable about him that makes me want to smile when I look at him (awww). His friend was talking about how he was such a ladies man and how he went through girlfriends a lot and he was like, "Well I got bored." haha Not cool! But he is really religious and I swear I heard him say he hasn't kissed anyone yet and doesn't plan to until he gets engaged (?!?!). Woah..definitely interesting. And I saw him checking me out...OOOlala SCORE! *shakes ass*

There is so much work that our Lit teacher is making us do. We're reading two books, one "The Tempest" which we're reading it in class, plus a zillion other things that go along with reading these two books, then an essay and a whole bunch of other crap. Blah. Oh then I found out I'm playing Miranda and have to wear a "long, flowing dress and flowers in her hair" lmao. That is gonna be a sight.

Thank you commenters :D -- Sez, Becca, Mez, Reed and Kena.

Incredibly bitchin new layout lol. I dunno if you could really call it that...but let me know what you guys think :) Today was really good. I think my period and those durn hormones were screwing with my brain and making me sad. Did I mentioned I'm in Art Club? Ha yeah GO ART CLUB! We're painting these bowls and I'm planning to do some kind of Indian/Arabic theme. I was looking for inspiration online and Indian jewlery and body art is just amazing. I love their abstract designs, bold colors and use of jewels. There is such a beauty to it. I feel like an art critic lol. Anyway we are selling these bowls and if someone actually buys mine I'm going to feel so special! hehe

I'm also thinking of doing yoga. I was interested in doing it this summer but never got around to it. When someone mentioned in my comments that I should try yoga it re-inspired me. It'll be a good relaxation tool *sits cross-legged and Ummmms* haha Now that I'll be joining a yoga class I'll have to get some REALLY tight spandex ROFL. That'll be DEAD SEXY. You know it!

Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who commented last entry...you guys give good advice and make me feel better *big hug* :) I promised myself that next week WILL be better and I'll get my self out of this rut. Nothing much going on, just sitting here drinking water in my FREAKING HOT room. Its so warm in here I'm sweating buckets. I'm bored. *searches for blow up Zac doll*

I decided to customize my larger than life Hanson Street Team shirt to make the fit a little better. I'm going to find some cool way to "do it myself" hehe. I'm a DIY-er *snort*

New layout soon (be EXCITED).